Monday 9 September 2013

Gemmas little sister stories.

When i was in college, there was a girl I used to sit with during science lessons. As soon as I sat down she would ask if I had any more 'Gemmas little sister stories' about whatever trouble my sister had got into over the weekend. After college we lost touch but a few months ago we found each other on facebook again. :) After catching up she asked if I had any 'Gemmas little sister stores' I told her to get a coffee and clear a couple of hours lol. This is another one of those so hope everyone reading has a cup of coffee! Just to be clear though this is from memory and what I've been told (not always true) so nobody sue me over details :p
To sum up so far my sister is 3 years younger than me, she has 3 daughters, Mollie, Evie and Lillie, she also has 3 repeating men in her life (there are many more but the main 3 I mean) C, P and R. Now when my sister turned about 13 she went off the rails a bit, drinking, sleeping about and if rumors were true taking drugs; she calmed down when she started going out with C when she was around 15-16 and we thought that was it. Fast forward to her being 18, during a 'break' from C she slept with some other guy whos name I don't remember and ended up pregnant, he wasn't interested so she went back to C. Sadly she ended up losing the baby but things with C got better and they ended up having Mollie just before her 19th birthday. Fast forward again 2 years shes now pregnant with Evie. We think everythings fine but little do we know that R has come on the scene, not long after Evies born and it all goes to hell. Sister and C are both on Coke and split up *sigh* She ended up in a private rent house and her and R become a full on item. This lasts about 8 months of a continuous cycle, they love each other, they fight, he beats the crap out of her, they break up, they love each other, they fight...... you get the idea. Anyway about 8 months in she meets P. Bit older than her, has couple of kids from a previous relationship, works, seems stable, ok great we think, this can work. Few months later, Lillie is on her way. Surprise but maybe it will work out. Nope, someone ring Jeremy Kyle, few months into the pregnancy sister admits there was a R/P overlap, we'll need a DNA test. Lillies born, DNA shows P as the Daddy (thank god) You may think here is where the happy ending starts? No chance. Here is where the trouble well and truly starts. Sister is young, we get that, 3 young kids, can't be easy, but on the weekends where kids are with their dads she takes to not coming home. C tries to drop girls off at 6 on a Sunday, sister nowhere to be found. Usually shows up 5 hours or so later steaming drunk and god knows what else in her. Social services are called but nothing done except referral to Homestart. This continues for a bit, the police even being called the night before Mollies first day of school as sister comes home around 1am with her friends and flips when Mollie refuses to let go of me resulting in a physical fight. During this time she's flitting between R and P with most likely some overlaps again.
Suddenly she seems to get a clue, with support from us, homestart and medication she decides to make a go of it with P and the two of them rent a house together. Its all calm, all going well then I get an early morning phonecall, sisters been arrested. Turns out theres been an overlap between P, R and a third guy. R finds out about this and theres a big fight at the house and P rings the police. Makes sense, police show up and sister chases R out of the house with a knife saying shes going to kill him, makes less sense. At this point P decides he's had enough and leaves, don't blame him, R moves in (yep you read that right) This however doesn't last long, the night before hes due in court for beating up sister I get another call, hes woke up, sisters gone, hes had enough I better go get girls before he leaves them alone. Obviously I go pick up girls, try to contact sister but no chance. 7 hours later we find out R has been sent to prison and sister shows back up at the house, very obviously off her head and not caring where the girls are just wailing what will she do without R. Finally social services get involved, though in retrospect I use that word in the loosest sense. That happened in September 2001 and my sister was drinking, taking drugs, neglecting the girls wellbeing and repeatedly going back to a violent relationship which the girls witnessed over and over. Its now September 2013 and my sister is drinking, taking drugs, repeatedly going back to a violent relationship..... so basically no further forward. I went to social services yesterday to talk to them but after a number of messages and promises to call back still nothing so going to camp out at the offices until SOMEONE sees me. Probably won't do anything but hey got to try havent I

2 comments:

  1. I think I got all that - bloody hell, poor kids, poor you and poor her, I have a cousin a bit like that but thankfully only one child.
    Well done Gemma on trying to do something although it is like banging your head against a brick wall :(

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  2. I've tried keeping up over the years - poor children and poor you having to deal with all of this. I just can't understand why social services aren't getting involved - I have seen them take children off of parents for far less than what your sister is doing. Maybe it is because they know that you and your Mum will always pick up the pieces and that she does have you to fall back on. Hope you manage to get someone to listen to you xx

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Thanks for your comments. :)